My Saturn Return

Follow me...

I've learned some things over these last couple years, man. Not just lessons, but there's been a shift in the way I think, and my sensitivity to certain things have been heightened too. I always thought that with all the chaos and changes in my life then, that there must be a point where things start to make sense again. It was an interesting time, not saying things are settled now and I have everything perfectly planned but in contrast, there is a huge transition from before. I can't remember the last time things made as much sense to me. Trimmed the fat, reprioritized, woke the fuck up.

It's hard to express, but it doesn't matter if I do or don't, it still exists. Sam Cooke was right.

The necessity of this mental, spiritual , situational, whatever transition I'll attribute to cosmic energies, cause it just sounds cool and certain things speak sense, smell me?

Some things happen in time, not by accident. Lots of forces to embrace. Just the way things work, I think. I don't wanna get too talkative on this cause I could never make things make sense typing anything out, I sound like Ramblin' Jack over here. The point of this blog is passionate individualism...you like that? But if anyone is reading this and would like me to elaborate, send money & concert tickets. Everything is smoother than a dolphin's forehead.


Love is Love

Michael "Page" Turner

That wasn't his real middle name, but the man deserved it. It would have been his 40th birthday, 2 days ago. To go into detail on how much his creativity inspired me would take too long, and I am known to ramble on about things I love.

It's insane to think how much I would spend to secure a variant cover that he did, from any publisher he worked with. Or how much I'd look forward to the convention when he'd make the long trek to Toronto.

Perhaps most impressive about him was his personality. Even if you just met him, you felt like you were the only one in the room, the way he spoke to you, and the stories I have with him I'll keep with me forever. Just like the drawings he did for me.

A marker sketch of Rainier in a hardcover one year, and an even better one which leads me to my fave story of him.

I was at the last Fan Expo he attended, and on the last day, I didn't bother bringing much stuff for him to sign, I just lined up to basically thank him for making the trip, considering his health issues. I told him that with my parents separating, and the drama of moving and balancing that situation and my cat passing away, having him attend made that summer shine. He felt bad and offered to draw me a sketch near the end of the day.

Yes, HE felt sorry for MY situation. Anyone unfamiliar should look up what THIS man had to go through in his life. What he STILL was able to accomplish, his lust for life, all with a great smile on his face. I was shocked! I don't remember what I said right after, but I noticed my friend Saif just happened to be right next to me when Mike made that offer.



So I went back later, and after he came back from a Space TV interview he let me come to his drawing table near the back of his booth to get a sketch. I had a great conversation with him while I got to watch how smooth his pencil lines were, as he drew a Grace head sketch, head held high, with tiny dragons in the clouds in the distance. My favourite sketch ever.

Right after, I asked him to do a sketch in Saif's hardcover, which he signed earlier. It was Saif's B-day the day before. When I passed it to Saif, Saif walked right back and shook the man's hand and Mike told him happy birthday.

Then! Jason Truong, blogger extraordinaire, and the man who quietly photographed what was the last photo of me and Mike together (Above, right on top of my unworthy drawing, thank you, J), didn't wanna bother him so me, feeling on a high, asked Chris Rupp of Rupps comics, a man I gave hundreds of dollars to, online and in person, to get em to take a pic together...and J got a sketch too! Happy Times!

Cherished memories, lots of photos and videos, and a smile on my face after typing this. A familiar feeling from anyone who met him. Bless him, and I hope he can see what influence he left on his fans.

19 & Life

I'm not sure why, but I was recently reminded of the time I volunteered at the Metacentre. It just hit me, I don't know. Spring has a way of recanting past experiences for me. I guess it's the whole Earth Goddess, time of renewal vibe, digging up prior events (earth? digging? you're welcome...)
So at this centre, I volunteered under a part time modified self-defence program created by one of my TKD classmates, as a reward incentive for good behaviour. Basically, if the patients at the centre behave themselves they would be allowed to suit up and take some aggression out and have fun.
This wasn't as simple as it sounded, unfortunately, and the reason is that the Metacentre takes care of patients with mental, cognitive and behavioural problems.
As fun as it was to see how happy they were to train with us, it was also great to speak to the caregivers at the facility. When you see people who genuinely care about their jobs when it has to do with such a sensitive, and emotionally intensive labour, it's reassuring to know these people are out there. Shout outs.
One week, Something happened to one of the patients where they couldn't participate. I don't wanna get into that, it would almost sound like gossip about the mentally handicapped, but this person couldn't participate. And she was very disappointed, is what I heard, and the classmates felt bad for her as well.
When I heard how sad she was for missing out, I felt guilty for some reason. Like I was this lucky 19 year old care free kid who can come and go when he pleases and seek new fun experiences when I get bored. She was stuck here, and because of certain circumstances, her fun options were controlled for her safety and well being.
At the end of those few weeks, we all had this little celebration goodbye thing, with the patients and caregivers and we got to say something to everyone as a whole. I remember rambling, (people who visit my blog would not disagree with this) and I never got to express how much I appreciated the experience. They had fun with us but we had a blast with them, and I don't think 19 y.o. Brian properly conveyed that.
So maybe that's why I was thinking about it a little bit ago. Guilt.
I never did pick up my refernce letter from them, I experienced my reward.
That was a long time ago though. I'd like to think 29y.o. Brian is wiser, appreciative, cunning, faster, ambitious and greater at life than he was, but you know, I don't wanna sound like a prick :p

Through Rose Coloured 3-D Glasses

I think we all have great ideas. Potentially, we can think of anything at anytime, and create a masterpiece. An idea, an invention, something to enhance the lives of people around us. The only thing stopping us is understanding the technology to support it. I play rhythm guitar. Sometimes I regret not learning to play violin or piano, cause I'm pretty sure I can create some bomb, bomb tunes. But I have a friend that created a really nice song with a keyboard, and doesn't even play some of the instruments used like the string section. Technological improvisation.We all have that epic musicality inside of us, waiting for the right tools to bust through the perceived monotony like a friggin canonball. That's why people say they can't draw. That's why I have some sort of complex about it too. everyone can draw, but when you compare yourselves too much to others, you think it isn't worth it. But when you start playing around with the tools they play with, all of a sudden you get these new ideas, new levels of creativity, "what if " situations start guiding you like a carrot on a string, showing you that certain seeds can reach fruition with enough patience and diligence. New(relatively) technologies can translate into new ideas. This sounds a lot headier than it really is, and I think because it's Sunday morning, I feel like writing something long, with maybe not that much substance to warrant it...but if you reached this far, maybe it wasn't as tedious as I thought it was :p Maybe I should train to be a novelist, right after I learn to use spell check. Oh, and I posted these two because I wasn't sure if the one with the blank background was too plain, or the one with the messy background, was too Ed Hardy ish.

Who Can We Get On The Case? We Need Perry Mason again. Uh Uh A-gain.

Was there a classic metal band performing in the city last night? I'm just gonna assume rather than spend the 20 seconds to confirm it, but let's say there was.

I love seeing the 40-55 year old demographic out on a post concert drunkenly stroll, it makes me feel good inside. I couldn't tell what the fuck they were singing, which was unfortunate since audio remains an important sense to heighten the emotion, but I'm gonna assume it's Ozzy.

What if it was? How cool is it that dude is still performing for people who grew up worshipping their liner notes? I used to think I would want my favourite bands to stop touring and hang it up like a wet sweater, preferably not as a result of suicide but a decision they made mutually, by the time they hit 40.

As a person who just turned 29, and as a fan of certain bands reaching granpa age, I can see how dumb that mode of thinking is.

So to these die hard old schoolers i say Rock Out, hopefully with your shriveled genitalia still in your pants.

U MAD?

Now in Technicolour! Remember that used to be the tagline? Updated technology, kids, watch our show! So, Thundercats. Very dear to the breast for me. There will be a reboot, linky here. People have issues with the redesigned costumes. I think they look great, the animation studio has a good rep, and Cheetara is still hot. One of the producers admitted that the whole reason this got greenlit was because the execs wanted that action figure chedder. U mad? I don't wanna hear no ranky, 'bout "it's not the same, they shoulda been left alone"...HEY! I don't like LOTS of modern takes on things. I'm from the generation where Saturday morning cartoons in your pj's eating fruit loops was the only way to start a weekend. We had absolute classics, back2back. Things change, but we can change the channel. Give it a chance, i say , cause it looks like awesome beef. And if this is successful? Bring your rainboots cause the floodgates will be staying open for a decade or so with hopefully some of the prettiest, regurgitated ideas the cartoon network can take a shovel to, ya dig?

Imitated Duplicate

I have a friend who's a really good imitator of accents. He's so good, I end up laughing about it days later out of nowhere, with a stupid suspicious grin on my face. Every West Indian accent, East Indian...like Russell Peters(or like my dad keeps calling him Peter Russell)

I've always admired people with that skill, from cartoons to videogames...even going back to primary school when we'd get storytellers, uh, telling stories. Pretending is fun. You can be who you want to be for that short period of time, if you convince yourself you're that person. It's like Karaoke without the music.

A few weeks ago, I was watching TMZ (what>:() when I decided to check around for something better. I don't know why , but I started watching some "debate" like CNN style, though not on CNN. It ended up being some lame argument about Lindsey Lohan, and these people were SERIOUS....but I watched it for a couple minutes, strictly for journalistic critique of course, when all of a sudden they bring on like their fourth guest to join the "debate". It ended up being Josh Keaton!

I love dude, he did the voice of some cool cartoons and videogames, including the younger version of Revolver Ocelot from the Metal Gear Solid series. Man my email address for the last 10 years contained ocelot, and it was cool hearing that voice in his voice. So I don't know why he was on, but whatever. Definition of random I guess.

I wanna talk more about this stuff. Some good stuff.

Synchronicity Part Deux!

I meant to post this soon after my Blind Fury post, but I was with some friends talking about that guy, Blind Rapper slicing rappers to pieces, and I start thumbing through a copy of Inked magazine. I'm telling you, if you haven't thumbed through this mag yet, you're missing on some eye candy, sweet sweet nectar. It showcases tattoo artists from far and wide, and has great cultural pieces, history, gang culture, all of that.

Anyways, so I'm talking and thumbing and we start getting technical about Fury, like, there's gotta be some kind of sense of visual perception. He can't be 100% blind can he? I figured it's like that commercial where this kid is at a street corner, making fun of a blind man with a walking stick. The kid starts waving and hopping in front of the guy's face like a douchebag. Then as soon as he turns around, the blind guy starts imitaing him perfectly, with the message explaining the whole partial perception thing.

So after I explain that, I figured his sight resembled Daredevil where he goes by vibrations like a bat. Two seconds after that, the very next page, what do I see but a splash page of a guy with an incredible daredevil tattoo.

I almost jumped from my seat. In fact, I made a weird noise when I motioned them to check out what just happened.

So for the tl;dr people, this shit happens alot. Don't deny it, cause there are no coincidences. And there are no rules, when you've got play-doh.